Perspective

A few weeks ago I sat in this room in São Paulo Brazil. I sat as our pastor filmed the story of these two men. A story that challenged me ... because it gave me a huge slice of perspective.

You see the man in the pink shirt is an alcoholic and once was a bad criminal. The man in the aqua shirt is now a pastor who was once a police man who tried to kill the man in the pink shirt many times for his criminal acts .... They are now friends! Oh the story is amazing and I won't spoil it as soon it will be put to video where you can hear in their own words, their story. But for me it was crazy perspective ... Our family has been walking through something over the past few months that has really been challenging to me. It has rocked my world in ways that I really can't even put words to.

Yet as I sat in that room and listened to a language I didn't understand and then heard an interpretation and began to understand this man's story ... God spoke to me. I went up to the room that we were staying in and looked out over the favellas. Looked out over the streets and at the people who were milling around in the streets. It was there that God showed me how wonderful it is that I live in a place where no matter what I may face there is help available for that and a community who surrounds me and supports me.

This man and his wife are both battling addictions and help is just not as easy for them to find. To break the cycle of addiction to alcohol and drugs they need help and it's just not right around the corner. They live in the favella where rats steal what little bit of food that they have ... yeah it offered me a huge slice of perspective.

Can't wait for you to hear this story ... hopefully, each day we look around at what we have and are thankful because no matter our story, no matter where we are now ... there is someone somewhere who has a story that is worse off. And I'd be willing to bet that no matter your story, no matter how hard it is right now, there is someone who would trade places with you in a heartbeat - a HEARTBEAT ... even if your story is not wrapped up with a pretty bow on top ...

Going to Brazil

 Last October I had the opportunity to go to São Paulo, Brazil. We partnered with a church in the flavellas (slums) and we just went down to love on the people there. We worked on some physical things around the church one day, went to an orphanage, played with babies, handed out necessities, and participated in a children's festival. It was a trip that changed me in many ways. When I boarded the plane to come home to my family, it was hard. I was leaving a part of me in Brazil. I knew I wanted to return ....

Fast forward to this past may when a team from our church went back ... I wasn't able to be a part of that team - May is a crazy month for our family. I got texts of pictures of kids who asked about me and updates on kids I asked about. I even got a text of a kid from our pastor who said that he could play Jeremy if there was ever a Brazilian movie made about his life :) I just longed to be on that team. However, that trip I was not meant to go on.

I began pestering :) my pastor about the October dates as soon as he returned from the May trip. I knew that there was this longing in me to go. Finally, last month he said it would be October, but no definite dates just around the Children's day like last year. So, I sent out my prayer letter and gave a middle of the month time frame to last years supporters.

As the last month has gone by more and more I have wondered if God really wanted me on this trip in October. We have had medical bills out the nose lately and it seems that one is paid and another comes in. As soon as we have done one test they want to do two more. Do not get me wrong, I want to find out what it wrong with my baby and will do whatever necessary no mater the cost, it just began to make me wonder if this was my time to go to Brazil or not.

I began to pray that God would just show me what he wanted from me. Did he want me in Brazil in October? Were these His desires in me or were they my selfish ones?

Over and over again God has confirmed that Brazil in October is where he wants me. Over and over as I would doubt God would confirm that this was where He wanted me. Yet, I still doubted. Then yesterday, a friend texted to say she had bought some bath and body work lotions and soaps for me to take with me. And then today I got an email from a friend telling me that he will support my trip again. Two back to back confirmations that God used to tell me that this is HIS desire in my heart and that he will pave the way. I am not to worry about the finances, they are in his court. He will take care of my family here at home and he will take care of me. I will not doubt anymore - forgive me Lord for my lack of faith!

I love how He is involved in the intimate details. I love how He confirms a prayer that I've prayed and not shared with anyone else. I love that He chooses to use me and that He speaks in a still small voice. I look forward to going back and seeing the smiling faces of the boys below. One is Gustavo and he holds a piece of many on my teams heart, not just mine! Just something special about that kid and I pray that God will use him to do great things in his flavella!

If you would like to know more about São Paulo, Brazil, if you would like to join my team through prayer or financial giving ... just shoot me an e-mail and I can answer any questions you may have. I'd love to have you join my team!

Looking forward to both the journey to Brazil - (what God does in me before we even leave) and what God does while our team is there!

9 Years together ...

9 Years ago two incredibly naive people walked into a church filled with family and friends eager to get married. Marriage, marriage is what brought us together that day! ;) (two points if you get the reference) However, we had NO clue what the road ahead would bring us. None!

As a single girl you dream your whole life possibly, of the day you will put on a white gown and have your father or someone walk you down an aisle so that you can meet your handsome groom at the end and be joined together in a union that will last until death do you part ...

That is the way it is supposed to be at least ... the death you do part statement. A lot of us look at marriages around us and we project that they are happy as they appear to be and some are, but I'd be willing to bet that many, sadly many are just faking it hoping they will make it. They aren't sure if they will make it to the end of the week much less the ends of their lives. Marriage takes hard work. Hard work by two messed up people whose lives have been joined by a vow and a mutual love for the other.

What is a vow? To me, the vow I made 9 years ago is what I leaned on when times got tough in our marriage. I won't bore you with the gory details of our "stuff" but there was a day when we could have thrown in the towel and said "I quit, I'm done". Honestly that day was more real and scary that I'd like to admit. However, the Lord kept reminding me of the fact that I made a vow not only to Jeremy, but to HIM. I stood before my family and my friends and I said that for better or WORSE I would honor, love and respect my husband. I hadn't done a very good job at that during the "worse" moments of my marriage. The Lord reminded me of so much that I felt walking out would be so dishonoring of Him and my vow to both my Lord and my husband. So you know what, we dug in our heals and we did some hard fighting. We had some amazing friends who stood in the trenches with us and were on their knees praying for us during that time.

So here we are 9 years later, a stronger couple than we could have ever imagined walking into that church in GA that hot Saturday in August. Our union is stronger than I ever dreamed it would be during our "worse" moments. I'm thankful for those who stood by us, fought with us, loved us and prayed with us through our hard times.

Jeremy, I love you more than I can express. The man you are today is a strong man. One who loves the Lord and his wife and family. One who puts his God first, wife second and family next. One who I'm proud to say wears my ring on his left hand. I'm proud of the family that God gave us. I look forward to many, many more years ahead. I look forward to wherever God will lead us together ... It's going to be amazing babe! I'm thankful I get to do this journey WITH you! Thanks for asking me to walk beside you through life! I'm thankful for the lessons we have learned since that hot day in August 2003! I LOVE YOU!

The grass is not greener on the other side of the street ... the grass is greener where it is water and fertilized. How are you watering and fertilizing your marriage?

Raising support ....

Raising support is not something I enjoy. I am blown away by friends of mine that do it for their lively hood. It scares me honestly. I have had to raise support several times for mission trips and it is always the part I dread the most yet it is always the first part of the life changing part of any trip I have been on. I say the first part because it is not just a thing I do to get to go, it is the first part of my trip. I'm still state side but the process of growing and God working in my life and heart begins here. I go on the trip to be used as a tool for God's purpose but every single time the trip is a tool used by God in my life. I know this time will be no different.

 When I first heard about this trip to Brazil my heart had this huge tug on it. I wasnt really sure why. Was it God telling me he wanted me to go or was my heart pulled because of the orphans that those on the trip would meet? I think the fact that I was adopted has placed a huge desire in my heart to care for orphans. Having four children of my own, I don't know how this desire will be fulfilled in my life. Until God is clear about what he desires from my family in this area, I know that I can help others in their journey. So when this trip came I knew that I could do something with what was welling up inside me ... To love on the least of these that many forget about. However, I was still unsure about whether this was the trip, or if this was the right time. Going without Jeremy was something I really didn't want to do. But this tug wouldn't leave me alone.

On faith I put down my deposit knowing God would clarify what he was asking of me. If he wanted me to go he would show me and would help me with the support raising that I really do not like.

We got home from vacation and I had a support check waiting in the mail from a friend from Atlanta. Then yesterday I received two more checks and with them a peace that yes God is asking me to go. I still have support to raise in order to go, but I have a peace that has calmed me that I can't explain.

I am looking forward with great expectation to what God will do in my life this trip and also how he will use me to love on the people of São Paulo, Brazil. I look forward to sharing more with you about this trip and how God works in and through me. I look forward to loving on the least of these in Brazil and I look forward to my God loving on me and my heart at the same time. To God be the glory!

Awaiting Keegan Update

Yesterday, I was sent by my OB to a high risk OB doctor. I have been feeling very dizzy / light headed for a few weeks and then I fainted on Wednesday and fell. I'm still feeling very dizzy / light headed. So they wanted to determine why. She did an ultrasound and looks like Keegan is already the size of a 37 week baby even though she is only 34 ... what can I say ... we grow them big in our house :)

My regular OB had put me on bed rest because of the contractions I have been having. The high risk doctor told me I didn't have to be on bed rest but to limit my activity alone due to my sciatica and falling. The bed rest is aggravating the sciatica and making the pain / falling worse. She said that she would not stop labor at this point if my body decided to do it on it's on - she felt Keegan would be just fine if I went into labor at anytime. If she does not come on her own before Dec 20th we will have an amnio that morning and if she is ready induction later that day / evening! It is still surreal to me that I could be holding my new bundle of joy in just 18 or 19 days ... or less if she decides to come on her own.

It just seems so much more real to me now that it is winding down .... ready or not family of 6 here we come! :)

Thoughts on being a receiver and needing help

I am realizing over the past few days that I am not a good receiver! It is so hard for me to have people do FOR me, to not be able to do for myself. I love to give, LOVE to give and I love to help wherever I can. But the past few days the tables have been turned on me and I am realizing that I am a poor receiver, it is so hard for me to ask for help or NEED help. I love the feeling I get when I help others but it's just not the same feeling when I am the one needing help.

I have amazing friends who are all jumping at the chance to help me and my family during this time of bed rest, yet, I find it so hard to receive their help or even ask for it.

I am so thankful for my friends and for how they are rallying around me and my family right now. If you are one of the ones who has or is helping us during this time ... THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart! I may not be good at asking you or even receiving your help but I am VERY thankful for it!

Why is it so hard for us to be on the receiving end? Why is it so hard to ask for help when we need it?

Bed Rest ...

This weekend my doctor put me on Bed Rest :( It's not as fun as it sounds :) But, the contractions have slowed down and baby girl is still safely inside doing cartwheels and practicing her kick boxing.

I on the other hand am going stir crazy. Thankful to my hubby and my kids who kept me company. We watched football together and cheered on the Dawgs as they beat GA Tech! It was a beautiful day .... even if it was spent in bed.

Special thanks goes out to my hubby who put up our Christmas trees and to the kids who helped him decorate them both. Sad that I didn't get to be a part of it this year. That is always a fun time watching the kids pick spots for their ornaments and seeing all the ornaments they have made through the years. There are two that melt my heart each year. Both kids were in the same 2 year old class for pre-school. Different years but the same teacher. She made these ornaments with them each year and the end result was a snow flake with a picture of my little 2 year old snow flake inside. There are several other picture ornaments on our tree and it just reminds me how quickly my kids are growing up. It's too fast for this momma's heart! One day I'll be in my momma's shoes and my kids will be bringing their kids to visit me and I'll be going to visit them. I want that day as far away as possible :)

So since I'm bored on bed rest ... tell me what are some good books you have read lately or a good movie I should watch?

And my heart broke ...

This morning on the way to school, I had to fight off the tears. Our neighbor across the street asked if his daughter could ride with us this morning because he had an early morning appointment.

Two years ago his wife slipped and fell and has been in bed ever since with her injuries. She sleeps most of the day because of the pain meds she is on. She has very little interaction with her husband or her kids.

This morning as we were driving to school I overheard the kids in the backseat talking. As they were talking the friend kept telling the boys how much she loved their mommy. Then what brought me to tears is she asked them if she could live with us because she wanted a mommy that wouldn't sleep all day.

I just felt so sorry for her ... my heart just ached for her and the missing role of mom in her life right now. I pray that God will heal her mom and that she will be able to be back to being a daily part of her daughters life soon.

I also drove away after dropping them off and thanked God that I have not had to work outside the home. I was just crying out to God and thanking him for allowing me to be available to my kids 24/7 .... what a blessing I have taken for granted!!!

If you think about it please pray for my neighbor and their family ... please pray for this mom and that she will be able to be more a part of her families life. That God will take away her pain and that she can be more present in her daughters life because she definitely needs her.

Oh what a night!

So I couldn't sleep last night! From like 2 AM on I was tossing and turning. I think I finally went back to sleep around 5:45 AM ... Just in time to get up at 6ish. Perfect! :)

You would think that I was going into labor tomorrow or next month not 4ish months from now, give or take. I was going through names in my head, trying to figure out what color to paint the nursery, pining over peoples reaction and thinking about Jeremy's new project in our garage. :) Oy vey, those of you that know me really well will just smile and laugh at me because you know this is me. Others will want to have me locked up in a padded room or something - don't worry this is just me. I'm a planner and that switch is so hard to turn off! So hard!

Naming this baby has been something we have talked about for a while. We had names already picked out with the boys if they were boys before the ultrasound so it was so easy. Kennedy was harder even though Kennedy was our girl name had Ryan been a girl. For some reason we didn't just LOVE it when we heard the tech tell us we were having a girl. Now, we had a boy name picked out going into our ultrasound but we are miles away from a girl name. There is a name we both love BUT I'm afraid of what may come for my girls if we name this one that name. So we are both still tossing it around. Maybe one day we will throw it on the blog for a poll and get your thoughts - all 5 of your thoughts :)

Oh well, I must get my munchkins up and ready for church. Tomorrow school starts so we have a ton of things to do today to get ready for tomorrow. I can't believe I'll have a first grader and a kindergartner in my house. Teary just typing that .....

Fear

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)

I read that verse and my head knows one thing yet my heart feels something completely different. This pregnancy has been very different for me for many reasons. It came as a complete surprise to us on the due date of the baby that we lost in September. I have had a lot of sickness and pain with this pregnancy early on that I didn't have with any of the others. It has been hard for me to get excited because I am extremely fearful that we will lose this baby too. I pray and I pray that God will remove my fear, that he will help me to cast my fears on him, that he will give me peace. Yet, somehow I still seem to hold on to my fear. I know that it is on my side because fear is not from God. However, I am unable to unclench my fearful hands and rest in Him. Just being completely honest and vulnerable here.

So, if you think about me, please pray that I would be able to let go of this fear and enjoy the next 20 or so weeks of this pregnancy. Thanks!

8 Years

8 Years ago we said "I do" to each other. It's crazy to think that it's been 8 years. In some ways it seems like a blink of an eye and in other ways it seems so much more than 8 years.

In 8 years we have .... lived in 5 different houses in 3 different states. We had 3 children, experienced 2 miscarriages, and now have one on the way. We have experienced some high highs and low lows. We have traveled together and learned to make our marriage a priority. We have fought through some hard times in our marriage and we have come out on the other side and look forward to how God will use this story for His good. We have learned a lot and have a lot to be thankful for. 8 Years! I look forward to all that lies ahead of us.

Jeremy, I love you and I'm thankful for you in our lives. I'm proud of you and all that you have accomplished and the man you are today. I look forward to how God will continue to work in our lives and use our life together to further His kingdom. Thank you for being you and for loving us the way you do! Thank you for being the husband you are, the father you are and the friend to all of us that you are!

I love you!

Dear Mr. Anonymous

A couple weeks ago we got our water bill in the mail. It literally floored Jeremy and I. We called the water department and they sent someone out to audit ... the result was we owed the bill ... $437.40. We had recently put in new sod and had been watering more than normal. We knew it would be higher but in no way expected it to be that high! This bill was 10 times our normal bill of around $40. We joked around that we needed 437 of our friends to send us $1. Jeremy called and they said they could work out a payment plan with us but he would have to come down in person and see them. So Friday, he went down and when he got to talk to the lady she started reading the notes on our account. She informed him that a Mr. Anonymous had paid $100 on our account.

Jeremy got home and started telling me this story ... I had tears in my eyes as he shared this with me. This was a huge blessing in our lives. It blew us away. We are beyond grateful and thankful for this act of kindness in our lives.

Mr. Anonymous ... THANK YOU! We pray that you are blessed 100 times over. Your act of kindness has blessed our family and we are truly speechless!!! So if you happen to read this, please know that you are a blessing and that we are very grateful and thankful for your act of kindness toward us!

Glory Baby

This week we would have been 39 weeks in our first pregnancy and 14 weeks in our second pregnancy that both ended in a miscarriage. Had the August pregnancy not ended we would most likely have had a baby last week - since I tend to go at 38 weeks. I've been doing a lot of thinking this past week. Wondering what it would be like to hold my forth, wondering whether it would be a boy or a girl. Just wondering ... all the while knowing that God has the best in store for me. Even though it may hurt right now and there are the "could be's" and "should be's" going on in my head ... he is the I am and He knows ultimately what is best for me. He doesn't promise me an easy road but he does promise to walk with me through it all.

This song by Watermark pretty much sums up my feelings, one day all my wondering will be answered. Until then ....

GLORY BABY

Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby…baby..
You were growing, what happened dear?
You disappeared on us baby…baby..
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe until we’re home with you…
Until we’re home with you…

Miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there’s a
day when we will hold you
We will hold you
You’ll kiss our tears away
When we’re home to stay
Can’t wait for the day when we will see you
We will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘till mom and dad can hold you…
You’ll just have heaven before we do
You’ll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little babies, it’s hard to
understand it ‘cause we’re hurting
We are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we’re stronger people through the growing
And in knowing-
That all things work together for our good
And God works His purposes just like He said He would…
Just like He said He would…

BRIDGE:
I can’t imagine heaven’s lullabies
and what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing, heaven is your home
And it’s all you’ll ever know…all you’ll ever know…

Do NOT worry ...

Matthew 6:25-34 (NIV)

²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

It says for me to not worry ... in fact in my Bible these words are in red which means they are the very words of Christ himself ... HE is telling me not to worry. So then why do we find that one so hard to follow through on?

Last night Pace cried for an hour before he went to bed. He was in pain and there was nothing this momma could do but hold him, pray for him and cry with him. I tried very hard not to let him see me cry but as soon as he was in bed, they came. I know that many parents are facing far worse diagnosis with their children .... however, it is still so hard to see your child in pain and not know what is causing it. Knowing that we are doing everything we can to help him but it's not fast enough to keep the pain away from him. Seeing the pain get worse every day is hard. I just want to scoop him up and take it away, wipe it out and tell him that all is well. I can't do that and it is hard for me. I'm a fixer and this one I cannot fix.

Worry creeps in and I pray. I pray that God will heal my child and give me peace. I pray that I can just leave it in His very capable hands .... that part, if I am honest, is hard for me. Leaving it and not worrying.

So today I am telling myself ... Do NOT worry!

Welcome Home mom!

We had an amazing welcome home from our children! When we drove into the driveway on Sunday the boys were outside holding welcome home signs that they had made, complete with notes telling us that they loved us and missed us. They were talking miles a minute as they told us about their days and many hugs and kisses were received. Kennedy was sleeping when we got home so when she woke up from her nap I was standing by her bed. She looked up and said "Hi mom" and then the biggest smile swept over her face as she realized that we were home! It was too sweet!

It didn't take long for reality to set in though. Back to life, back to reality couldn't be more true. Sunday night we had a sleep walking child so momma got no sleep wondering what might happen to him. It was hilarious afterward but scary still for me. Monday morning was the kicker of all kickers. Lunches to make, breakfast to serve and as we were walking out the door Kennedy had a HUGE accident - BIG TIME. So much so that I had to give her a bath and really didn't think either boy would make it to school on time. Jeremy was actually walking out the door as well so he's trying to help me call someone to see if they can pick up Ryan while I'm upstairs cleaning up the messy child. It required a bath at 8:20 in the morning! I think maybe that describes how bad it was.

So welcome home mom! We didn't want you to forget what it was like to be a mom since you had the past 8 days to lie around and be pampered and waited on .... get back to it!

I love it and wouldn't trade it for the world. Though it was nice to have a bit of a break :)

1st Lost Tooth

The tooth fairy came and paid our oldest a visit last night. He lost his first tooth at dinner time last night. It had been loose for a while but last night was hurting him as he ate a burrito so I got the honor of pulling it out. It was very ready to be out. His new tooth is even coming in behind it already. Hope it works its way forward or his teeth are going to look funny.

For his first tooth the tooth fairy left him $5 .... I explained to him that first teeth are a bit more important than the rest and to not expect that much for the rest of his teeth. You see, when he realized what was left for him, his other teeth were automatically loose :) Oh the power of deflation ....

Oh the first milestones ... so glad that I get to be a stay at home mom and that I don't have to miss these firsts!

Life is tough sometimes

Sometimes life is tough, sometimes it just plain stinks! This weekend was one of those tough moments for us. We experienced another miscarriage this weekend. Friday morning the tears just wouldn't stop rolling. We were not far along but we were still excited - nervous excited.

We didn't tell many people because we were nervous due to the recent miscarriage in September. I thought I had kept a wall around my emotions not letting myself really think about 9 months down the road but I guess I didn't do a very good job because they hit me like an 18 wheel mack truck when the reality set in that I was having another miscarriage. We were so guarded this time, we didn't really know how to get excited or whether we should or not. We were scared, nervous, anxious and excited all rolled up into one big bag of emotions.

This weekend I experienced one of those times that I don't want to even admit to ... In 72 hours I have gone through so many emotions, so many. Friday morning Jeremy and I just held each other crying and all I could do was whisper "why" through my sobs. I didn't and still do not understand. I'm still raw - thought maybe writing this post would help me move past. I have asked God why, begged him to reverse it, and been very angry with him -- all the while knowing all the right answers and words in my head ... My heart just hasn't matched up with what my head knows to be true. God has seemed rather silent on the matter - just letting me have my moment, not forcing himself or any cliches in my ears.

It's ironic - or rather just God's timing that right now I'm doing a study on Esther. A book in the Bible where God's name is never mentioned. We are doing Beth Moore's study. And one of the first weeks she said that there are times in our lives when God seems absent or quiet but that we can be sure that those are the times when he is nearest to us and to not doubt the quietness for his absence.

So right now I am going to cling to that ... that He is near even though my pain is speaking louder that what I know to be true in my head. He will guide me through this and thankfully he is patient enough to allow me to work through this and gently waits for me to fall into His arms.

My hubby left me a note this morning before he headed out for work and it said ... "This too shall pass. We will get through this TOGETHER." He's right and we will ....

3 Little Valentines

These guys make me smile each day! They are an absolute joy to parent and I am so blessed to have them as mine!!

For Valentines this year I got to go on two dates. One with my Big V Valentine, and one with my 2 little v valentines. Jeremy took me out first and then he helped the boys ask me out on a date the day after Valentines day. My two little men brought me a balloon and a few flowers. It was so cute as they asked me to go out on a date with them. Jeremy put money in Ryan's pocket and told both boys how to treat me on a date. We had such good conversation.

While we were out on our date, Jeremy asked a little 2 1/2 year old princess out on a date. He showed up after work with an orange rose and off they went. She was so excited to go out with her daddy. By the time this girl gets to the age of 20 or 30 and she is allowed to go on her first date, she will know how to be treated by a male because her daddy will have set the bar so high! Jeremy said she talked the entire time they were out, I don't doubt it at all because she has so much to say. She doesn't like a quiet moment, she talks ALL.THE.TIME!

I love that my children know my first love is with Jesus, my second love is for my husband and that they fall in line right after him. I love that they get to see their father date me and love me and that they get to go out on special dates with us! I love the look in their eyes when we are together ... they know they are special, they know they are loved and they know that will never change!

I love my family!

I think I see the light ...

... at the end of the tunnel. I think we are slowly emerging from this funk. UGH! We have never been this sick before in the history of our family. This was the first year that the kids did not get a flu shot and it will be the last year that they did not get a flu shot! It would stand to reason that the one year I didn't get them the shot would be the first year that they got the flu. But, they decided to share with me and well, it's one thing that I don't mind them being stingy with :) HA! Someone lovingly phrased us as "drowning in the flu". They were not off base. :) It has been one insane time and one very exhausting time!

I do want to publicly thank my wonderful hubby! He has been a rock during this sickness that has lasted about 2 weeks ... first with the 12 hour bug and now with the flu. He has held down his job and our home without missing a beat, he has cooked meals, taken kids to school, wiped noses, given medicine, cleaned up vomit, etc ... and I don't think I heard him complain one time!

Thank you Jeremy for taking such great care of us!!! We owe ya big time! I love you!

It's a SICK house!

So we are dealing with another sick weekend around here! It's crazy! We have never been this sick, this long before! Go figure that it's the one year that I didn't get the kids a flu shot! Who knows what we have this time, but it's for sure viral. Right now it just affects me and the little boys of the house - K and Jeremy have been spared ... let's hope they stay that way!

I'm very thankful for my hubby for many reasons, but this weekend he has taken very good care of us and he's had to do it all by himself. I think he is actually looking forward to a break tomorrow by going to work :)

Hope you all are staying well!